♥ I missed my flight to Narita! D:

As you can see from the picture-of-the-day
(I've decided to post one in every entry I make),
CMY and I have got no pennies to buy our air
tickets and so, we could only day dream about it
during Economics. D: Just kidding. We were doing
price discrimination today and thus, that explains
the fake air tickets. I really really want a real one
though.. Anyone wanna buy me one for the coming
June holidays? D:

Anyway, during break time today, Joey Ng was
sharing an article from Her World with us and it
was pretty sad, I would say. A woman who had
some problems conceiving, lost her twin babies
and her husband. One of her twins died because
of I-can't-remember-why and she had to give up
her other twin as well because the baby was infected
with her fever.

Should she decide to keep the baby, there would be a
high chance of the baby having some brain defective.
Making the painful choice of giving up on her remaining
twin, the woman then went back to her parents' home
to recuperate for a month. When she finally went back
home, blablabla (all the in betweens), she realised that
her husband was having an affair BECAUSE she couldn't
give birth and her husband wanted children.

It slapped her hard in the face as she felt that she has
failed badly being a woman and a wife. Maybe if she did
take better care of herself when she was young, she will
not encounter such a problem today. However, I do feel
that such things are already predetermined by God. How
do we know whether what we are doing now, will affect
our health in the future? We're still young and there are
so many things that we are curious about. Why is it that
only certain people get certain diseases though we all do
the same thing - example, smoking?

Is it fair to rob us of our future ability just because of
curiosity? So we started to talk about it and we were
saying how we would divorce our husbands if he wants
a child and we couldn't conceive. Its just too bad that I
wouldn't be able to give him what he wants. Even if he
did make it clear that he doesn't mind, I think the fact
that we can't have our own child would still bug me. I'll
still choose to leave him, I don't want him to use that
"You didn't even give birth to my child" to slap me in
the face when we ever do quarrel in the future. Like
what Joey Ng says, a woman's primary / main / core
"function" is still to give birth.

I think the saddest news a woman can ever receive,
is to learn about her inability to conceive. So women,
do take care of yourselves and help your other halves
carry on their family line in the future. And men, don't
ever despise your wives if they can't conceive in the
future. Its not their fault, nobody wants the inability
to conceive. =/

Moving on, while CMY and I were busing home earlier
on (she took the bus to Clarke Quay so it was just busing
home for me), she told me that I'll be the last few to get
married among the four of us. Not really a bad thing, I
would say, because frankly speaking, I personally think
of it that way as well. Though the reason that CMY gave
was totally irrelevant ; she said my expectations are too
high and that its hard to find someone of my standards
in Singapore, I don't even think I have any standards at
all. Oh well, obviously everyone would want the same
typical standards like rich, good-looking, blablabla...

Honestly, I don't really give a shit. My main criteria is not
whether my other half would be rich or good-looking. All
I'm looking for, is someone who can endure my nonsense,
my randomness and my unglam-ness. Someone who will
pack his bag and leave with me when I go crazy and say,
"I wanna go to this and that place NOW". Someone whom
I can be totally comfortable with showing my unglam-ness,
someone who will give me a sense of security.

Now now, I'm talking as though theres really someone
whose willing to marry me. Hahahah. I'm not okay! I think
another reason why I'll be among the last few to get married
(other than the reason that nobody wanna marry me D: lol)
would be because I'll really think hard and long before coming
to a decision on whether I'll regret my choice or not. Apparently,
I'm someone who always make my decisions on impulse and
thus, I'm always regretting.

Marrying is the life long choice for every girl, okay? Which is
why we cannot afford to make a wrong decision. How do you
know who is the RIGHT person? The IDEAL person and the
right person may not necessarily match you know. Okay, got
to eff off as this entry is getting wordy. I'm looking forward
to tomorrow because we're going to have 4 periods of break
since my Economics teacher will be away on course. Jya. :D

♥ 7:14 PM